Sam Kinison

When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man.

Society needs a couple of vents that say what you're not supposed to say.

If I've learned one thing, it's 'don't tell the truth.' Lies keep you together.

It was like going to church, except Ozzy Osbourne was there.

I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock 'n' roll and ex-wives. In that order.

Anyone can go out on stage and start beating people over the head with rubber chickens. That'll get people's attention.

I've never been against women. That anti-feminist rap is bogus. I think men should be nice to women, buy them diamonds.

Everything can be satirized.

If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows.

I started saying things in church that didn't meet with a lot of approval - like 'Jesus isn't coming back.' They started throwing Bibles.

It was great to be the rock comic, the shock comic. But after you've played Giants Stadium with Bon Jovi in front of 82,000 people, after you've done the 'Wild Thing' video with Jessica Hahn and every rock band from hell, you're not gonna top that.

I have lived a carnal life.

Just because I do a few comedy bits about gay people, that does not mean I'm out there promoting some anti-gay cause.

Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'

I'm a comedian, and my comedy has never endorsed violence towards gays.

Jim Bakker. He's lost everything, he's ruined. And the worst thing of all he still has to wake up to her!

I'd rather entertain people than offend them.

I don't deny my life-style is occasionally pretty wild.

I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.

I'm not going to give up the shock part of my comedy.

So many of these comics are just frustrated singers or actors - they want to get a gig doing a sitcom. It's paint-by-the-numbers comedy, lame joke-telling. They're drawn to it as a career move.

AIDS is a horrible disease, and the people who catch it deserve compassion.

Real comedy doesn't just make people laugh and think, but makes them laugh and change.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

Every generation has someone who steps outside the norm and offers a voice for the unspeakable attitudes of that time. I represent everything that's supposed to be wrong, everything that's forbidden.