Jim Norton

Ozzy Osbourne is one of my favorite interviews, he's so good.

I think what's happening is that women are allowed to be funnier as we stop pretending that there are subjects that they shouldn't address.

There are just some things that I don't think jokes are good for.

I wanted to do a talk show that reminded me of the old school ones I loved as a kid, without all the fake enthusiasm and sound bite-driven conversations.

All major cities are the same. People have the same sensibilities and they get afraid of the same subjects, groaning at the same things.

The biggest killer to funny is hyper sensitivity to certain subject matter and Montreal is as guilty of that as L.A. or New York or San Francisco.

I find when most people are offended, it's phony. It's an attention-seeking device. So I love to call them out on it from stage.

You just have to believe in what you're saying and be able to explain why you said it. There's nothing I say that I can't back up or at least explain why I came to that conclusion, so I'm not afraid of getting in trouble.

If someone doesn't like a comedian that's fine; a lot of people probably don't like my standup, and that's fine. But I think that the problem is people want you to get in trouble. That's the issue.

I hate my hair so much.

I have cowlicks, so my hair has always been a source of torture for me.

I think people like to label everything. I just think it's comfortable.

If I leave the mike in the stand, my hands absolutely move more. I'm not sure if it's a conscious thing.

I don't really like Phil Robertson and I think his opinion about gay marriage is stupid. But in a country where we want an honest conversation, we have to realize that part of the honest conversation is hearing things we don't like and discussing them.

If the show is going really well and the comedian is still annoyed with the audience, chances are he's a Boston comic. That's the beauty of Boston comics.

I love everything about Boston. The women are phenomenal, they're all dirty. It's just a really great place to do comedy.

I date but nothing really long term. I haven't had much luck. I probably haven't met the right woman. Most probably know to stay away from me.

I'm very careful with my money.

Americans have always been inconsistent and kind of fake with outrage, but we've just slipped totally upside-down.

Every comic says things that are going to offend someone, so we all have to defend each other with this stuff.

Anyone who can't tell the difference between a joke and hate speech is just stupid.

Obviously I'm 100-percent for freedom of expression.

I'd like to get my own TV show on, whether it's a talk show or a comedy, that I write.

I love doing the radio, and it's different every day. But stand-up is just you and the immediate reaction of the audience. So I love both.

Anything you can do that's self-destructive in Vegas, whatever that is, I do it.

It's really the old question: Does art inspire life or does life inspire art? Maybe it's a combination of both. But Trump represented something. He didn't create what we are. He comes from what we are. And he's a representative of what we are, whether we like it or not. He's just not our better nature.

Comics who consider themselves 'mavericks' or think the crowd doesn't get them are normally lousy comics.

I never care if the audience groans.

To me the important thing for a comic to be is emotionally honest.

I don't watch too much television because I want to write something, and you never want to be influenced by other things that are on - and if they're really funny it'll just depress me because it's something I'm not a part of.

I don't think any comedy is ever shocking. I don't buy that. That's just what people brand it, when someone is saying something they don't like.

I want people to feel like there's nothing they have to be worried about laughing at. There's nothing that can't be made fun of.

I know I'm funny, and I like to be in front of people, and the fact that I'm good at that. It's the one thing that gave me self-esteem.

If I'm gonna make fun of Trump, I'm gonna tell you things that I've done that are similar. I like to tell on myself, as well as make fun of the people I'm talking about. I feel like it gives me more of a right to make fun of them if I am talking about myself, too. It's more fun for me that way, honestly.

I got really lucky that at age 12, I knew I just wanted to be a dancing monkey in front of people and entertain them, or try to. It's amazing that at age 12 I realized what a needy life I was gonna have.

A lot of racism is paternalism. A lot of people hide their own racism because they treat blacks, minorities and other groups like children because deep down they feel superior and better than these people. And they don't feel like they should just treat a guy like a guy.

It's really hard to truly want people who you hate to have the right to say whatever they want. And we all disguise the ugly self-centeredness of it.

Here's the rule of thumb: When the entire family looks like the unibomber, they're against gay marriage.

The one curse in America is that we deny who we really are and what we like.

A lot of times the mainstream public loves something, critics will hate it and then they'll think the public is stupid and they're above the public.

If somebody said about me, 'I don't think his jokes are good, I don't think he's a good comedian,' I don't like to read that but that's a fair thing to say.

My instinct is to be honest and make fun of things.

Google is not my friend. I've been way too open in my career. Google has killed any shot I have on the dating apps.

You can't worry about saying something that will get you in trouble because the line changes so fast. If you try to navigate it, you will not only suck but eventually say something stupid and get yourself dumb anyway.

No matter how many books I've sold, nothing can correct the fact I look like Alfred Hitchcock from the side.

I love Philly so much. I know that at any time, any place, a fight can break out. Those are great comedy fans.

For me, a good comedy town is filled with people on the verge of a riot. They need something to relieve the tension.

Don Lemon is one of my favorites. I love him.

You never want your greatest work to be 10 years ago.

With 'Mouthful of Shame,' all of my fans or the majority of them said it's the best thing you've ever done and that meant a lot because as you go on with time, if they're still really enjoying it, that means you're getting better.