I think God loves to hear little kids laugh at fart jokes. He didn't just make sunsets and bluebirds, He made hot babes. And dirty old men like me. That's the modest message I've set out to tell the world: you don't have to be Ned Flanders to be a Christian.
More Quotes by Orson Bean
The movies saved my life. I grew up in the great depression, the only child of a pair of star crossed lovers. My father lost his job. My mother drank. They fought. The movies were my escape.
I remember the glory days of film making. I used to go to the movies a lot.
Being happy is a revolutionary act; I think it spreads, like ripples in a pond.
I'm greedy for experience. I keep finding new things.
Back in the fifties (the nineteen fifties, not the eighteen fifties) I did some writing for Mad Magazine, along with my friend Ernie Kovaks and a pair of comics named Bob and Ray.
I've made a lot of dumb mistakes, but I don't regret them at all.