Getting older is a hideous experience; I'm so glad I only have to do it once. But I've kept my mind, my career, my relationship, and I have enough money - I've been blessed.

I know that a lot of my life is spent thinking about crisps and eating crisps and hating myself for eating crisps. It's just not worth it. Or it wouldn't be if crisps weren't so delicious.

What's the difference between herpes and love? Herpes is forever.

It's very hard to talk about Palestine to Jewish people - they see me as a betrayer.

I don't understand why gay people are so anxious to get married.

It's shameful to admit, but it's been a bit of a lifelong affair, and I do now feel I'm as good as it gets. I'm honourable, kind, friendly, warm, intelligent, generous, and I've got a good sense of humour.