Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people.
More Quotes by Chris Rock
You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.
There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity.
A man is only as faithful as his options.
Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.
When I do stand-up, I'm basically doing a one-man show.