I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you.
More Quotes by Andy Rooney
Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.