Daniel Mallory Ortberg

I spent the first 22 years of my life absorbing everything, like a big disgusting cell, and now I'm disgorging it with jokes added out into the world. That's a really gross metaphor.

Weirdly, often the more I write, the more ideas I have.

I have fun going on Twitter and the Internet. I feel safe and comfortable, and I wish everyone could feel that way.

I graduated with an English degree and worked for awhile in academic publishing.

There's no specific mission statement for the 'Toast.'

Usually my writing is very over the top and bombastic and very, like, 'I'm amazing! Look at me!'

I love reading religious authors. Especially in the sort of circle I move in, people tend to be more secular, and I love reading books by just really smart people of religious faith. It's always a really cool perspective.

I grew up in a home where reading was a big deal.

I have a lot of faith in the power of joking to make something thoughtful.

In the hands of a passive-aggressive person who wants to abdicate responsibility for things, texting is a great tool. You can really go nuts.

It certainly was unusual growing up with two fairly well-known pastors as my parents.

When I think of Emily Dickinson, there's not one particular poem of hers that jumps out, but I do have a very vivid image of an ill woman with giant eyes who wants to write about the sun exploding.

I love 'Jane Eyre,' and I love the Bronte sisters. I actually didn't read any of them until I was in college, so I don't have quite the same connection with them that I think a lot of women do.

I attended an evangelical Christian university on the outskirts of suburban Los Angeles and by the time of my graduation was neither evangelical nor Christian.